Complete and Utter Bliss

Something New

Everything is Scattered...

the never ending list of books to buy/read

Mrs. Dalloway (Virginia Woolf)*
Please Kill Me: The Uncensored Oral History of Punk (Legs McNeil)
The Little Locksmith (Katherine Butler Hathaway)
The Bielski Brothers (Peter Duff)
The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath (Sylvia Plath)*
Out of Africa (Isak Dinesen)
Howl (Allen Dinsburg)
The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand)
On the Road (Jack Kerouac)
Lord of the Flies (William Golding)*
The Jungle (Upton Sinclair)*
The Count Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)*
Ethan Frome (Edith Wharton)*
The Wizard of Oz (Frank L. Baum)
Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf (Edward Albee)
A Clockwork Orange (Anthony Burgess)
Gone with the Wind (Margret Mitchell)*
A Room of One's Own (Virginia Woolf)
Slaughterhouse Five (Kurt Vonnegut)*
The Da Vinci Code (Dan Brown)
Helter Skelter: The True Story of the Manson Murders (Vincent Bugliosi & Curt Gentry)
Looking for Alaska (John Green)*
The Phantom of the Opera (Gaston Leroux)*
The Giver (Lois Lowry)
The Portrait of a Lady (Henry James)*
Life of Pi (Yann Martel)*
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man (James Joyce)
Fight Club (Chuck Palahniuk)
Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)*
The Secret Garden (Frances Hogdson Burnett)*
Of Mice and Men (John Steinbeck)
Bridget Jones' Diary (Helen Fielding)
Breakfast at Tiffany's (Truman Capote)*
Their Eyes Were Watching God (Zora Neale Hurston)
The Hobbit: Or There and Back Again (JRR Tolkien)
Flowers for Algernon (Daniel Keyes)
The Boy in the Striped Pajamas (John Borne)
Annie's Baby (Beatrice Sparks)*
Jay's Journal (Beatrice Sparks)
The Screwtape Letters (CS Lewis)
The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Victor Hugo)*
Lolita (Vladimir Nabokov)
Interview with a Vampire (Anne Rice)*
The Importance of Being Earnest (Oscar Wilde)
James and the Giant Peach (Ronald Dahl)
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (Hunter S. Thompson)
The Killers Angels (Michael Sahara)*
The Castle of Oranto (Horace Walpole)
A Lifelong Passion:Nicholas and Alexandra: Their Own Story (Sergei Mironenko & Andrei Maylunas)
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (Ronald Dahl)
Dracula (Bram Stoker)*
Dead Souls (Nikolai Gogal)
Tuesdays with Morrie (Mitch Albom)
A Mango Shaped Space (Wendy Mass)
Sophie's Choice (William Styron)
The Hours (Michael Cunningham)
The Five People You Meet in Heaven (Mitch Albom)
Frankenstein (Mary Shelley)
Pygmalion (George Bernard Shaw)*
Franny and Gooey (JD Salinger) 
Ham on Rye (Charles Bukowski) 
Tuck Everlasting (Natalie Babbitt)*
Bridge to Terabithia (Katherine Patterson)
A Child Called It (Dave Pelzer)
Gathering Blue (Lois Lowry)
The Hiding Place (Corrie Ten Boom)
Night (Elie Wiesel)*
Atonement (Ian McEwan)*
The Picture of Dorian Gray (Oscar Wilde)*
The Perks of being a Wallflower (Charles Chbosky)*
Anna Karenina (Leo Tolstoy)*
Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte)*
Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte)*
The Lord of the Rings (JRR Tolkien)*
The Chronicles of Narnia (CS Lewis)*
Alice in Wonderland (Lewis Carroll)*
The Catcher in the Rye (JD Salinger)*
Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen)*
Emma (Jane Austen)*
Madame Bovary (Gustave Flaubert)*
In Cold Blood (Truman Capote)
The Bell Jar (Sylvia Plath) *
A Christmas Carol (Charles Dickens)*
David Copperfield (Charles Dickens)*
Great Expectations (Charles Dickens)*
Little Women (Louisa May Alcott)*
The Complete Sherlock Holmes (Arthur Conan Doyle)*
Oliver Twist (Charles Dickens)*
A Tale of Two Cities (Charles Dickens)*
Sense and Sensibility (Jane Austen)*
Mansfield Park (Jane Austen)*
Northanger Abbey (Jane Austen)*
Persuasion (Jane Austen)*
Lady Susan (Jane Austen)*
Uncle Tom's Cabin (Harriet Beecher Stowe)*
Through the Looking Glass (Lewis Carroll)*
Wicked (Gregory Maguire)*
Son of a Witch (Gregory Maguire)
The Complete Tales and Poems of (Edgar Allan Poe)*
Rebecca (Daphne De Maurier) 
Influence (Mary Kate & Ashley Olsen)
Invisible Monsters (Chuck Palahniuk)
The Freedom Writers Diary (The Freedom Writers with Erin Gruwell)*
The Other Boleyn Girl (Philippa Gregory)
House of Leaves (Mark Z. Danielewski)
Walden (Henry David Thoreau)*
Agnes Grey (Anne Bronte)*
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (Mark Twain)*
1984 (George Orwell)
Animal Farm (George Orwell)
Leaves of Grass (Walt Whitman)*
Catch-22 (Joesph Heller)
Charlotte's Web (E.B White)
Purfume: The Story of a Murderer (Patrick Suskind)
Matilda (Ronald Dahl)
The Tale of Peter Rabbit (Beatrix Potter)*
Speak (Laurie Halse Anderson)*
Dead Poets Society (N.H. Kleinbaum)
The Cider House Rules (John Irving)
The Memory Keeper's Daughter (Kim Edwards)
The Tales of Beedle the Bard (JK Rowling)
Swann's Way (Marcel Proust)
The Yellow Wallpaper (Charlotte Perkins Gilman)
White Oleander (Jane Fitch)
Peter Pan (JM Barrie)
The Joy Luck Club (Amy Tan)*
The Pianist (Wladyslaw Szpilman)
Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoevsky)*
The Code of the Woosters (PG Wodehouse)
Moby Dick (Herman Melville)
Daisy Miller (Henry James)
Vanity Fair (William Makepeace Thackeray)*
The Kitchen Boy: A Novel of the Last Tsar (Robert Alexander)
The Catcher in the Rye*





*(I own it) (I've read it)

Severe

Pistanthrophobia: the fear of trusting

Chelia Ma'am

Every time I think of writing a word, I think of this woman. Even if she lies buried under the moisture of the dirt and skeletons. She is my wisdom and reason I choose to write today. 


   Nothing is ever the same without her here. Sadly enough, she was the sticky glue who held us all together. Everyone has one of relatives like that. Special in their own way. Scrambled eggs with cheese and Mickey Mouse pancakes, oh yes. She was the one. My dear that I miss the most. 

I live in their old house with my momma. My bedroom is the room that she used as her dressing room. Even after all these years, I can still feel her in there. Not long after she died, did strange things start to happen. Everything broke at once. My DVD player, T.V., stereo, everything and it was magically repaired the next day. 
  
Not a day goes by and I don't think about her. But, isn't that the way it usually works?

A Thousand Fold

Legend says if you fold a thousand paper cranes, your greatest desire will come true.



I did the usual with waking up this morning and feeling ugly all day long. Along with admiring others afar with their beauteous luck. It makes me want to change everything and anything. I hate to be a negative Nelly 95% of the time, but maybe that's just who I am. Someone who finds negative and it turns it into some form of writing. All the while I can whisper...

 Someday, someday. SOMEDAY. I will write my heart's desire. I will change what I do not like in life. 


Today in Latin, we listened to what our semester project is going to be. We are to translate a poem, make a mosaic (out of anything but paper), and present it all to the class. Sounds simple. Heh, not!

 

First Dame

I'm starting this with plan in mind. Most of my plans don't follow through. 

The past few weeks have been all about finding the books that I've always wanted to read. After my birthday passes next month, I'm planning on visiting a few used bookstores to buy more books for my collection. I am ecstatic. At the moment, I am reading Little Women, Sense and Sensibility, and am about to start Wuthering Heights for my Senior term paper due in February. 

This may or may not be the most personal blog that I intend for it to be, but I hope to write more diligently than ever before. I've started plenty of blogs and never seem to post anything. Sometimes I feel as if I'm sending all of these words into a giant gaping void with no eyes to read what I'm trying to express. I am not the most intellectual being on this site, but I can say this is something that will grow with every passing day. I'd hate to call this a diary or a journal, but maybe a journey of self discovery. Something is going to help me through the hours when I have no one to turn to. And, I have to face it, those hours are more than I'd like them to be. Something like this, and I am lost in transition.